Recalibrating My Heart (Pt.2)

This week, I will be sharing a three-part series of reflections on that I hope will be of some small blessing to you. They are a short glimpse into the life of an intern and full-time student that has given it all to Christ and they describe the process of me learning first-hand, that God is ever vigilant in my life, the only one who can see beyond my masks and can judge the intentions of my heart... and my heart really did need some recalibrating.


In a session of self-examination and reflection, I decided to predispose myself with a receptive heart to the Lord. I was meditating on a couple of conversations that had been stirred up lately, as well as a light interaction that I had previously with Pastor Wayne. We were referencing particular things that throw us off our best; triggers that drop us from flying a high and solid 10 to low 3s and 4s. Surely enough, bad relationships and friendships came up. During my time in reflection, I recalled the many friends that I had acquired over the last couple of years. Many of which were forced to return to their respective homes due to the global pandemic and the federal ordinances that followed. Friends that I did life with—school, church, and other areas of life. Things that I had walked away from started to surface once again in me and I wasn’t too sure how I felt about it. Without a doubt, Jesus already had a contingency plan on getting me squared away and sharpened back up. I was growing spiritually dull as I began to engage in social norms and trendy customs that more and more compromised my faith and my desire for communion of God. It is crazy how easy we will swap out God and prioritize man, all in the efforts of being accepted by our peers. 

“Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil.” - 1 John 3:7-8 (ESV)

It can’t be clearer that God was looking out for me and the separation from these acquaintances—although some were Christian—was needed so that I did not fall back into habitual sins that violate the anointing He poured over me. I’m not perfect and I’m not the victim here either, yet I understand that even though I may at times reject His correction out of ignorance, He is patient enough with His child to guide me into the light and make sure that I recognize His good works. I am responsible for my own actions and I will be held accountable for deciding to be influenced by anything other than the Holy Spirit of God. I’m definitely more aware of what He is doing and my love for my friends has not changed, but my tolerance to their habitual sin or their influence over me has been altered. 

“What the true proverb says has happened to them: “The dog returns to its own vomit, and the sow, after washing herself, returns to wallow in the mire.” - 2 Peter 2:22 (ESV)

I plan on giving my best to God, and in giving Him my best, He will use me greatly in blessing those around me—both virtually and physically—with everything that He has deposited within me. I choose to be the influencer and not the influenced, to be the light and not the shadow. Thank you to those reading on and anywhere else that this may have found you.